I’ve never slept this deep. This was the most luxurious bed I’ve ever slept on. The white blanket that covered my legs until my waist felt like a ball of clouds covering me. The soft mattress massaged my back and my head drowned on the smoothness of pillow-sheet.
Suddenly I heard a voice of doors creaked. The door was now surely opened. Though I was not sure whether it was just my dream or real. Now I heard a little boy’s voice. Convincing? Being sarcastic? I was not sure. The tone was calm but you could hear how he tried to humiliate. How you could feel annoyed only by listening to the tone. I know the voice; it was someone that ‘he’ had introduced me few months ago.
I turned around, acting unconsciously. The blanket opened, my legs could feel the coldness of a night air. However now, I could not hear anyone voice. Now I was sure I just imagining things.
Suddenly, there’s someone sit down on the bed, next to me. I kept quite. Who could that be?
But then I heard a steadiness of breath that I had known better than anyone. Could it be him? I felt my waist touched by a hand contact. The slowness. The hesitation. The same touch as I remembered. I couldn’t wait for more.
However, the person stood up and there’s a short silence. I’ve got to take a move. I hold his wrist and brave myself to open my eyes.
There he was, standing, letting our eyes met. His black hair now had been cut into a new style, but the same edge as I remember. His face hasn’t changed, except that his expression looked older and mature. He got taller and his body now showed more shape. He really had got into his teenager world. I let myself astonished by him. By his existence and everything in him.
I didn’t want to lose him, before he’d ever gone away for the second time from me. I sat up and pulled him close to me. Let my lips touched his lips deeply. This will be our first kiss, and I wanted it to be unforgettable. His mouth. His tongue. Everything I had been craving for. Everything he has, to be mine for the last time.
I caressed his cheeks. The same skin I know. The softness. The smoothness. His white skin astonishing me, just like the first time. I could smell the same scent. He started sweating nervously while our lips still touching, however I never care. That’s what I like from him. His black straight hair was simple and shining on the yellow light. I let my hand hanged around his neck, while his lips still in my mouth.
He touched my waist and feeling my body for a while before he pushed me away fast. I fell down on the bed. No, don’t go….
I whispered.
He had now stuck on his place. I sat up and carefully pulled him into the bed next to me. Our eyes still met. His eyes are the best things I could ever see. I looked at his body shape. His chest. His neck. I put my head down on his chest. The same feeling I felt when he’d hold me for the first time. I felt like heaven. It’s better than anything just him, by my side. I came closer at him, our legs touched. I could felt his heavy breath and his fast heartbeat. Something I’ve done before. He moved surprisingly. I wonder what will he do.
His arms moved around me and hold me tight. Keeping me safe. Finally we could be this close. I let my hand felt the shape of his chest before drown into a deep sleep and this had to end.
In the morning I was awake by a movement. When he pushed me away from his chest. I turned to face him and kissed his lips slowly and gently this time. The contact burned my lips. I smiled. “Morning, koala.” I said as I observed his face and laughed for a while with my own joke, calling him koala. He used to hate it when I call him that, so I smiled and whispered, “Sorry”.
He sat up on the bed, turning back without looking at me. I sat up spontaneously. Almost touching his back when he firmly said, “Good bye, this will be the last time we ever met. I’m sorry,”
He stood up to go.
“No… No… NO!!!” my head screams. I hold his wrist, but he pushed it away. I stood up on the bed and hold his chest from the back. Harshly he pushed me until I fell hard on the bed, I wanted to stop him. However this is the best for both of us. But he should make it as soft as possible. NOT LIKE THIS…
He went and slammed the door. I scream calling his name.
My tears fell down. No… No… No…. I’m not ready. Please….
I fell asleep in the end.
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